Why will the X-Men fall when Kitty Pryde leaves? Because she’s got all the furniture in that case? Or maybe its the 10 speed racer thats up for grabs.

 Boy does Yellowjacket look like he’s in a funk or what? But wait, if he hurries, perhaps he can win a 10-speed racer. That’ll put a smile on his face.

Freud would have had a field day with this I’m sure. Of course now I’m thinking of that scene from Johns’ Avengers run with Wasp and Yellowjacket in Vegas.

Nice to see the Justice League spent a lot of their time being beaten way back when which proves its not a new phenomenon. Also, Superman looks more as if he’s swooning than beaten to a pulp by the Ultrahumanite. Also, not lack of 10-speed racer winning potential in the DC world. Shame.

Interesting. He’s scared of the hot silhouette, but okay to have the old crone hold the door open? Maybe its the silhouette’s puffy shoulder pads. That would do it for me.

Nice to see Superboy Whine way back when. Wuss.

So, they key that this all hinges on, is that Thor is talking at the same time or before the wolf makes his aarrrrrrhh sound and… oh what the hell, its Black Bison crossing over to the Marvel Universe and bringing Wildcat’s son. Hail Geekery!

I have to say, Marvel titles in the 70s were much better. And how about “I spent Midnight with the Monster on Bald Mountain” for a euphemism?

I like the trouser suit. It would have made a nice change to the upskirt shots the Maid of Might has been most synonymous for.

You may have noticed that As-yet-UntitledThursday has been MIA in the past … oh, months. I certainly know that our myriad fan has expressed some disbelief that we’ll ever be coming back. Yes, I’m talking about you Combination Ladders.

Anyway, fear not. The staff of As-yet-Untitled Thursday have been working dilligently during this time, conducting exclusive and extensive research – often, but not exclusively, on Gulf shrimp – into the global phenomenon that is the comics crossover.

However, in the interest of teasing we’re not going to reveal all today, but rather pad out over the next few weeks. Given the topic, this approach is extremely appropriate.

Stay tooned.

Yeah, this one doesn’t look good Captain Atom.  Sliced across the midrift and … wait, is that water? Could it be that he’s not really made of nuclear waste, but instead is some sort of camel? Captain Paddling Pool may be closer to the mark.

Uh.. sorry. Medication time.

Now here’s a teaser. Why is it that Marvel couldn’t print this story until now (then)? Were there legal shenanigans? Was it because Thor had been healing a new face in Stadt? Had Enchantress’ gravity defying dress fallen in battle?

Yeah. Need to find this one. Seriously, I do.

There’s something neat about this cover. Why is there a cab and not a building being blown to smithereens? Thats not something you see on a day to day basis. Plus, its obviously moving, so is the cabbie toast? Where did the left front wheel go? Come on comics publishers – this is the stuff to get us interested!

To finish a tribute to Paul Levitz from Sept ’87. Good luck in your new endeavours sir.

I love how the dog is sniffing around Hobo-flash. We all know what he’s thinking don’t we? “How brittle must this man’s bones be to be able to run so fast?”

Peter, you’re friends are freaking out right now. Not sure if its because of the huge Spider-man behind you all waiting to give you a bear hug of death, or because you’re too self absorbed to notice.

Wasn’t there an Earth-2 Batman, or was he dead by this time? Are the Justice League sure they’re being crushed or are they just itchy? Why is Batman smiling on that left column? Why is Black Canary’s wig so poor? So many questions, but really isn’t it more fun not to know the real answers?

This explains so much don’t you think? Nice hooves.

Have you ever seen an angrier hemorrhoid? No amount of Preparation H would be able to shift that bastard.

Interesting angle. You can see the artist has a real architectural eye, picking out the twist-on-classic juxtaposition between road, pavement, buildings and 10 foot high heeled black pvc boot. Inspiring.

Ignoring the obvious narcissistic sexual connotations, because those are beneath us of course, could this be Arthur and Arthur trying their costume as King of Hearts? Nah, its definitely narcissistic and sexual in nature.

Pint Sized X-Babies 1. How can you walk past these cuties on the stand? Is your heart made of stone?

I wonder if he would have done this if Lex was the boss at the time? You also have to wonder, if you are President of the United States, would you trust a guy who came and said “If I go mad and endanger the world…” or might you think he had already got there and not trust him? Perhaps you might want to test it out or use the hand Kryptonite bullet that you have in your top drawer. Either way, you would ensure that Lois stayed under the desk just in case.

Don’t worry DD, they’ll dig it up in a million years and use super CSI technology to figure out who did it. Of course they won’t be able to arrest the Woolly Mammoth gang because they’ll be long dead. Still, they can wrap up the case quite easily and then get blind drunk.

It occurs that Superman related covers appear here more often than not. I think thats got to be because they are the most interesting looking, don’t you think?

This one of course has him naked in a capsule of some sort, about to be blasted to his death. Of course, that happens pretty regularly so my focus is on why the hell his costume is such a big deal and moreover why there are so many balding 50 something men bidding on it? You know as well as I do, if this happened right now, there would be 40,000 slavering fanboys who would be pushing to the front of the queue to get their hands on the Big S’ kit. Still, thats the 70s for ya.

So many mysteries to be solved here. What is going on with that mailbox? Why the upskirt shot on the statue? What in Sam Hill is an Abscam? Is it the 80s equivalent of Nigerian emails?

Truly this was a Bizarre comic as it included the X-Men. How odd. Also, first time I’ve seen Iceman portrayed as see through.

Did the entire issue have the Titans as puppets wandering about knocking into things, moving in very deliberate and slow ways? Or did Kori just wish Dick could be more like Pinocchio?

Included here because I am extremely excited by the fact that DC are releasing a Showcase volume of the first 25 issues in October. Hot damn, I am excited and if anyone out there would like to buy me it in time for my birthday then please go ahead.

Gail Simone and Neil Googe gave us their vision of the Superhero in retirement with Welcome to Tranquility, but what of our more iconic heroes? How will Superman, Hulk, Wonder Woman and Captain America fare as they slip closer to decrepitude?

The answers came thick and fast today as I Googled for something a little different, and found some caricatures of aged heroes by Donald Soffritti. Of course being my organised self I lost the link, so when I googled again I found a blog piece about an exhibition in France (Vraoum a la Maison Rouge) which featured a photographic representation of superhero retirement.

Here are both in all their glory with links to artist (there’s a book as well called Decadence which I’m trying to find) and the exhibition. Enjoy, and while you’re at it, perhaps now’s the time to think of your own pension. You’ll need something special tucked away* so you never end up like these poor saps.

Vraoum a la Maison Rouge

Donald Soffritti’s Blog

*Perhaps a gun.

An occassional feature where our hero ruminates on what he might have bought if he stumbled into a comics shop some time in the past.

I’m not sure if I’m concerned that so many books this month 21 years ago seem so fetishised, or that I think they are. Probably won’t spend too much time analysing that.

Everyone knows that Galactus did something funky to tie the Silver Surfer to the Earth when he disobeyed him. What you don’t know is that they struck a deal and Norrin was once more given the freedom to cruise the stars but only if he picked up exotic alien women and let his master watch.

Loving the chainmail variation there, especially with the dinky anklet. However, would it have killed this obviously world conquering “mistress” to wear some heels with it?

Yes he’s in some sort of phantom state (I can’t quite remember how Strange’s powers work, other than they are not normal – hence Strange) but does his floatiness require that sort of hand posing or has he been caught short mid epic battle and found that someone has fogotten to stock up on paper towels? Enquiring minds need to know.